Billy Connolly Quotes, Sayings, Remarks, Thoughts and Speeches
Billy Connolly Quotes and Sayings
- 1
Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 2
Fame is being asked to sign your autograph on the back of a cigarette packet.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 3
I don't believe in angels and I have trouble with the whole God thing. I don't want to say I don't believe in God, but I don't think I do. But I believe in people who do.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 4
I don't believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It's on my dashboard and you wind it up. The wings flap and it's supposed to give you a parking space. It's worked so far.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 5
I don't have wild dogs chasing people with scripts away from my door. I get my share. I've done okay. But I usually do independent stuff because that's mostly what I'm offered.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 6
I don't know why I should have to learn Algebra... I'm never likely to go there.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 7
I have been made redundant before and it is a terrible blow; redundant is a rotten word because it makes you think you are useless.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 8
I love Los Angeles. It reinvents itself every two days.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 9
I loved Japan. I used to read a lot about it when I was a child. And I always wanted to go. And it was delightful. I absolutely loved it. What a smashing place.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 10
I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of myself and my imagination as I used to be.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 11
I'm a citizen of the world. I like it that way. The world's a wonderful. I just think that some people are pretty badly represented. But when you speak to the people themselves they're delightful. They all want so little.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 12
I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 13
If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 14
It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he's telling them all different things.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 15
Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 16
My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 17
My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 18
Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it on.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 19
The great thing about Glasgow is that if there's a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 20
The only time I would like to see was the 20s and 30s in America because I love the music and the style and the optimism, I wanted to see New York being built. I wanted to see all that, you know.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
- 21
There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.
Billy Connolly | Refcard PDF ↑
